Surprise, it’s March 2017

One year ago, I made a post expressing how unmotivated I felt. Funny how it took place in March as well. 365 days later and I’m sad to say that this “bug” is back.

Catalyst: Unexpected Results 
As a university student, I strive to do my best in whatever I do. I have to admit, I do possess a “f*ck it” attitude at times, but I try my best to keep it at a low. I think a lot can relate to me when it comes to unexpected results. Working so hard yet the end result does not correlate to the amount of effort you put in. What makes it even worst is knowing that someone who didn’t try as much as you end up with a better result. It makes me think what the point in trying is and why I should put in so much effort if I don’t get the result that I expect

Moment: Moping  and Discouragement 
Lately, I’ve been circling this phase where I have sudden periods of negativity slaps. I’ll be perfectly fine but before I know it, I enter into a negative zone which consist of moping around and discouragement. Although I always remind myself that this is just a small portion of my life and that the end of the road is much brighter, I subconsciously return into that dark zone.

Goals: Lows as a Lesson
My goal is definitely to become more positive. It’s definitely very board but it’s definitely what my life is missing. I want to absorb the fact that reaching a low doesn’t reflect the rest of my life, rather it teaches me to become mentally stronger and recharges my motivation in order to reach to the ultimate high.

I want to try and update a lot more compared to last year. In 2016, I only made 2 post so I definitely need to up my game this year.





What Exactly am I Working Towards?

I have reached a quarter life crisis.

The Catalyst 
This year is my fourth year as a retail sales associate still running back and forth on the sales floor like one of the newer staffs. Every time I come into work and get placed on the sales floor, I can’t help but just worry about life and start to bombard myself with internal questions such as “why am I still here” or “what exactly is my purpose right now”. I look around on the sales floor and start to feel lost in the midst of all the newer staff members. All the coworkers from my very first summer are gone and all of the coworkers that started at this location the same year I did are either gone or promoted.

As I run frantically to meet customer demands, I start to question what exactly am I trying to achieve and why I was stupid enough to come back. I have no motivation left. Four years working for this company and I am exactly where I started. Nothing has really changed.

“Started from the bottom now I’m still at the bottom” LOL

I know so many people that are stepping into a new level of work, a place out of their comfort zone and are getting assigned more responsibilities and tasks with the newer, more professional jobs they have. With new responsibilities come new experiences. Exactly what I need. Secretly, I accepted to come back this summer as I thought I’d be taken off the sales floor and be placed on cash permanently or at least 95% of the time. Totally wrong lol.

The Next Step
I acknowledge that in this post, I am just ranting which in the end really leads to no solution nor tips that I can guide you with. Therefore, I decided to list my goals and plans for the future in hopes of getting out of this crisis and finding the motivation that I lost.

  • Next Summer 
    1. What I really want to do is work for a bank whether it be behind the scenes or directly working with customers as a representative.
    2. If plan A doesn’t work I would like to get a summer position as a legal assistant or receptionist at a law firm.
    3.  If plan A and B doesn’t work out, I would have to return to this current company or find a new retail job (perhaps at a mall). Right now, the chances of me returning are very slim just because I think I would go insane if I had to spend a fifth summer on the sales floor. (PROMOTE ME LOL)
  • Plans for this School Year
    1.  I joined a student finance group where I have the position as a marketing associate. I want to do my best with this group and create many strong relationships with the other team members.
    2. Do well in school. This year is the year where I really focus on my major (Law & Business).
    3. Get out of my comfort zone, enhance my creativity, and really work on improving my interpersonal skills.





It’s March and I’m Tired of Everything

I find it funny how every time it’s halfway through the semester, the rate of motivation that I have for things just plummet. Whether it’s school related, fitness related or social life related, everything seems to have reached its downfall and keeps dropping at a dramatic rate.

Why does this happen? In my opinion, perfection. I try to be perfect in everything that I commit myself to, so whenever I devote my time to something and the results aren’t at par to what I expect, a huge part of me just wants to flip a table and start shit up. Being a perfectionist is my flaw. I give myself such high expectations to the point where when the outcomes are a complete opposite of what I want, it feels like I’ve gone from living in a room filled with cupcakes and macarons to being thrown into a harry potter closet with just a can of beans.

So, if you are feeling like me and you’re at that period of the year where you feel like slamming your head into a wall, here are some dose of don tips that might give you a quick fix:

  • Get yourself a pair of earphones and listen to some music. While you’re at it, pretend like you’re the singer and just go crazy – have fun. Whenever I’m on the down side, a bit of kpop can always be the drug that helps me forget the miseries of life. Just escaping reality for a bit and entering into a world where you’re the star can really bring up your mood.
  • Eat something (and when I say eat something I don’t mean a bucket of fried chicken). Choose something that’s your favourite but healthy as well. I understand that during this time, a bowl of instant ramen sounds pretty good, but don’t you dare open that ramen package. Go over to your fridge, get yourself an apple or make yourself a salad and crunch it up. If eating this nutritious yumminess doesn’t help you feel better, please go look in the mirror and remind yourself that you had the strong willpower to choose it over the package of MSG ramen. Good for you, give yourself a pat on the shoulder.
  • Talk to your friends. I know that this step might be hard since I’m assuming some of you might not have friends that you’re at that comfort level of expressing your concerns to. Don’t worry, if you’re in this case, tumblr is the way to go (you’ll find people who can relate to you and find extremely hilarious posts that will make you piss your pants laughing) or you can go out of your shell, pick the closest acquaintance you got and just vomit your worries. If you do have friends, TALK TO THEM. These people are going to be your support and the people that will be real with you. They will probably give you better advice than I’m giving you right now.
  • Tell yourself “everything is going to work out in the end.” Sometimes all you need is a little reminder that everything is going to be okay. No matter how hard the struggle currently is, know that this current struggle will be a factor that will contribute to the successful future you. Think of it like a car ride to a vacation destination. Sure, the process of getting there will take a while, you will be tired, your bum will burn a bit but once you know it, you’re there enjoying every bit of your vacation. Although, you will look back at the car ride and remember how tiring it was, you will also come to the realization that if you hadn’t continue driving but instead turned your car around to head home, you wouldn’t be at your destination. I guess to sum this tip up is to always think in the long run.
  • Exercise. To be honest, I was just going to leave it at 4 tips but in my culture 4 is an unlucky number so I don’t want to risk anything. Anyways back to exercise, whether it’s going to the gym, doing some Cassey Ho/Mike Chang, or taking up a sport, do something that will make you sweat and release some endorphins. I admit that it’s extremely hard for me to carry out this tip since I’m a lazy piece of poo but whenever I miraculously convince myself to do some exercise, it releases stress and places me into a positive mindset. That positive mindset is so real that after the workout, I always tell myself “if you can get off your ass to do that killer workout, you can carry on with your day without any worries of anything that might come your way. Today is going to be a good day because you started it in a good way.”

So there you have it, a little dose of don to help you get over the mid semester blues and regain some motivation. Remember, as long as you got the willpower, anything is possible. Keep it up, you got a supporter (aka me just in case you didn’t know).


Much love,